So here it is:

[webdominatrix]

I'm sick. Very sick and have been for awhile now. I finally got my final diagnosis yesterday at the hospital:

I have colon cancer and a nodule on my left lung.

This does not mean that I have lung cancer too but they will have to do a biopsy on that one to find out. I can't tell you how excited I am for this (read: sarcasm).

If that checks out okay, I will be having surgery on my colon before the end of the month and will following that up with radiation. I'm trying to decide if I'll be rocking the bald dome or if I'll play around wigs. We'll see.

Anyway, the point of me telling you this is to let you guys know that I won't be around much because I'll be hanging with my babies and other friends and family. I will still be on myspace though and plan to blog about my journey through this as well.

PS-It's not about the pubic hair or what other people think is funny. Fuck, I think over grown pubes are gross and funny. I just don't laugh at people who were abused by a cult. They were given a directive and at that age or stage of abuse within the cult, might not have known better to trim. Either way, you either laugh at all they did to victimize others or not at all. You can't pick and choose which parts of others horror story that you'll find funny for yourself while admonishing others for doing the abusing. That is what I was saying and that's all I was saying. But, predictably, I was told to chill out bro (how Mike Weiland) and lighten up. I was given the, "I'm sorry but...". But what? It wasn't your experience so it's okay to laugh at others who went through it? I would never laugh at a dude who sat down to pee because I thought it was sad and emasculating that they did so under direct orders. I also thought they should've known better but I never said that. Why? Because they were victims of abuse and it wasn't for me to point at and poke fun of.

By the way, a real apology doesn't end with "but".

-Lise

[Kata6]

Hey, Lise.

I'm sorry to hear you're not feeling good. I will be keeping you and your family in my thoughts. You know I think you're awesome. We'll be here if you need us in any way. Give lots of love to those kiddies.

Lindsey

[-]

--

[webdominatrix]

Thank you Linds. That really means a lot to me to read that from you. I will make sure to give them extra lovin'.

G-We already talked so we're good.

[mzdiagnosed]

WebD,

I can't tell you how sorry I am to hear about your illness. I worried when I didn't see you on the boards for some time. Please know that my best thoughts are with you.

I have all kinds of deep thoughts about the issue you refer to here. I won't get into it all that but will say that you being "floored by the lack of empathy and tact (paraphrasing)" really merited careful consideration by all who post.

Anyways, I will miss your posts there and here- I'm hoping it's a slow down rather than an "I'm out." You know I think you kick some serious ass!

[webdominatrix]

No, it's definitely more of a slowing down than a full on peace out. I have a procedure to look forward to on Saturday where they will be jamming things into my colon and removing some of the cancerous polyps that I imagine are growing like mushrooms in there. What a delightful thought.

Anyway, I'm really nervous about it. What if I don't wake up? I hate, HATE being put under anesthesia (sp? too lazy to check). I'm always terrified that I won't wake up. Then when I do wake up, I have this horrible HULK like reaction to coming around. I start randomly yelling at people and even grabbed a Doc's arm once and wouldn't let go!

As a consolation, I have It's Always Sunny, Season 3 and Futurama to keep me company this weekend. Oh and lots of Marley approved pain relief as well, thank God. I truly do believe that no cancer patient should be denied access to that medication.

Ok, weird rant over. Thanks for all the love and support guys. I really appreciate it and I'll keep ya posted...

[-]

The prep is FAR worse than the procedure... trust me.

You'll do fine, baby....

[webdominatrix]

Yeah, I can't imagine that being given versed and demerol are worse than fasting for 36 hours, drinking eight 8oz glasses in a row every ten minutes until gone and then taking what seems like fucking handfuls of laxatives and phazymes for two days beforehand.

I'm looking at tomorrow like it's gonna be a Hunter S. Thompson-esque fueled narcotics binge sans the lizards. I can't wait!

And thanks G. I love you mamas.

[-]

;D

told ya... hope you're feeling beter

[webdominatrix]

Duuuude...prep was torture compared to the actual thing. Thanks for letting me whine and cry into the phone at ya, G. It meant a lot to me, really.

So, I had a colonoscopy that ended in a polypectomy with successful resection. No tumors were found which is a very, very good thing.

They don't think I'm going to need radiation therapy after all because I was literally somwhere between 0 and Stage I cancer of the colon. With the removal of the offending polyp, I am good to go.

I still have to have the nodule on my lung checked out but I am way more optimistic about that now after seeing how early and quickly my ass cancer was caught and removed. I do not think anything spread and certainly not all the way up to my lung.

Anyway, I thought I'd update you guys and let you know that I feel better than I have in weeks. I guess I'll be keeping my hair but honestly, I'm thinking about shaving it anyway.

[Kata6]

Hey, Lise! I'm so glad to hear the good news about your ass. I'm glad you made it through ok and I hope you're recovering well!

[webdominatrix]

I am thanks to Darvocet!

[IDBUG]

I accidentally clicked on this in my favorites and WOW.

I am so sorry, Lise, that you've been going through all of these medical problems, scares, procedures, and otherwise. Please let me know if you need anything. You know we're not far away--anything at all. I will PM you my number again.

Editing to add: Yay Futurama!

and... sorry for the incremental posts. I jump the gun often...

[IDBUG]

No, a real apology doesn't end with "but". A real apology also doesn't start with "I'm sorry" and end with "that you ______".

I was also very authoritatively told I and a few others need to chill out. I was also told a few other very interesting things by the same person. Wanted to tell said person exactly where to go in extreme detail, but I just didn't.

You're my hero, Lise. Thanks for standing up the way you did.

[IDBUG]

Hey Lise,
I'm so glad to hear they removed the colon cancer. I will keep you in my thoughts on all the other. Do you know when they are going to look at your lung?

I don't know if it helps or makes any difference, but my mother has a lung nodule too. It was found about 10 years ago, scared us all good. So far she's fine--no symptoms or difficulty from that nodule. They say it could be all kinds of things, they just have to keep an eye on it over the years.

Again, please let me know if you need anything at all.

--Tanya